unbidden

You come unbidden into thoughts
a relentless torrent of all I'd rather forget
Can't seem to let you go
despite fingers outstretched in surrender
I gave myself away
lost myself in the hope of you
only to find that hope a desolate being


and i had loved you
or at least a close approximation of affection
and had built in edifice to lay myself upon
in your name i had lost myself


if i imagine long enough
i can recall the touch of your kiss on my shoulder
the weight of your fingers interwoven with mine
your breath in my ear
unbidden desires stir, rise, still
saturate my waking thoughts
til the hurt blisters
and the dams burst


it had been an all consuming love affair
i had bled out
and you had marched on
time continuing on in your favor
you unaware or unaffected by my demise



time has healed, but still you come unbidden
reckless wandering into those swept up memories
a tumbling effect of thought and feeling
and a pang of regret still lingers
ever so soft